Life lately

Life has been super busy, stressful and hectic lately.  I have had a deadline on a current project that has forced me to work extremely long hours.  I have had assigments with church this past month that has required a lot of time.  And, to top it all off, this past week I had surgery for something I've been putting off for quite a while until I had had confirmation that all would be okay.  I love my family and am so thankful of their support they have given me.  I know Heavenly Father answers our prayers and confirms to us in our hearts and through our thoughts if we study it out first and then ask Him sincerely if what we desire to do is something He wants for us. 

I was reading in Matthew yesterday morning and came across a verse in chapter 19 where it states that with God all things are possible.  With Him, I can do so much more.  My limitations are only limits as I allow them to be.  I can do so much more with Him at my side.  As I allow Him into my heart and my mind, my personal capacities grow.   He is such a loving Father that He doesn't want me to be alone.  That is why He sends me the promptings of the Holy Ghost.  He lets me know that He is there for me, that I am stronger, and that "we" are stronger together than on our own.  He wants me to keep His commandments because in them that is where I find true happiness and this freedom alleviates anything that would hold me captive.  I heard our Young Women President compare the keeping of commandments to a funnel that I thought was great.  We, at first, may look at commandments from a worldly perspective or from the wide end of the funnel.  We have all these freedoms and choices we can make and think of commandments as limitations, thus our view is narrowed.  We think we can make 1 bad choice and pretty soon, after we've made a few more bad choices, our options become limited.  Our agency, or freedom, is narrowed  just like the skinny end of the funnel.  However, with a God-like perspective as we look through the narrow end of the funnel, we see how everything widens and opens up.  We see the freedoms and options that commandments actually give us.  Our views and perspectives change and we become enlightened as we do what is right.

Today, I spent roughly 15 hours engaged in the work of the Lord.  I left the house at 5:30 in the morning and didn't get done until 8:30 at night.  This just feels typical of a lot of my Sunday's.  I love it, but I do get so tired physically and miss being with my family.  It really is amazing how much the spirit does sustain me through.  I was so busy today but I felt so close to my Heavenly Father.  It just felt so good to be so busy in His work.  Lately, I have been thinking, and I am ashamed to say, that maybe I should be released from this calling because it feels like I just can't do it all.  I have had so much on my plate at work and then trying to spend any time with my family and the number of hours with church responsibilities that something had to give and that church things seemed to be the obvious factor to let go.  I love the gospel but it is definitely overwhelming at times.  Today was different.  I was so worried going in, but it was truly amazing to feel so close to my Father today that I knew He was letting me know that I am doing alright and that what I am doing is acceptable to Him. 

Sometimes, I was just feeling like I was failing because as much as I prosper in one aspect of my life, like doing better at work, all of a sudden, I am failing at my responsibilities of being a dad.  I was feeling like I was failing Brad, for example.  Brad's 11th birthday was back in February.  Since then, I have done pretty much nothing to help him with Scouts.  I hadn't even bought him a shirt.  Nichole did that for him.  Well, Friday morning, I was over at the scout office and bought Jake a shirt and all the other things that go along with it such as the patches and neckerchief.  When I got home and it was seen all that I had gotten for Jake, I was reprimanded for not helping Brad or getting everything for him who had been in the program a lot longer.  Righteous indignation can be a good thing sometimes because it reminds us where we can improve.  I was feeling so guilty for my lack of support for Brad that I tried to go through the whole Tenderfoot Rank in one evening with him in the matter of about an hour.  Sorry Brad!  I went on the campout with Brad a couple weeks ago up to Payson Lakes, but I need to be doing the little things in the home to help him, and my other children for that matter, to progress. 

I was reminded of this type of "progression" in children yesterday at the baptisms.  I was able to conduct the baptism for my good friend, the Bishop, Matt Killpack and his daughter Katie along with the Schultz family and their daughter, Sydney.  The 2 little girls, Katie and Sydney, looked so pretty in their white baptism dresses.  But, more important than that, I could see the light that shown from their faces.  Yes, they were pretty physically.  But, they were beautiful spiritually.  The teaching of the gospel to them at the home had definitely rubbed off on them and they had learned the truthfulness of the gospel from their parents and within the sacred walls of their home.  These two little children were excited to follow the example of their Elder Brother.  I can be like Matt and Josh and be a better father and teacher in the home.

Antelope Island 50K

Nate and I at the beginning of the race...it was only like 40 degrees

The last long distance race of the year for me was yesterday.  I did the Antelope Island 50K run, or about 31 miles.  This race was a trail run race around Antelope Island.  The trail run was neat because it is in an area where no one is typically able to go and see.  The race director gets a permit for the day and thus those in the race are allowed to go on this trail that is typically closed to the public.  In fact, the number of entries is even limited to no more than 75 participants.  These "ultra" runs have a totally different feel to it than a typical marathon.  It definitely feels more casual in which you are there to have a good time as opposed to competitively trying to push yourself to be the best.  For that reason alone, it was cool.  It was a beautiful run in which we saw bison and views of the Great Salt Lake that typically are not seen.  I did not realize how big the Salt Lake was.  This trail also went along the beach front of the lake as well as over mountain tops as well as through different canyons of the island.  It was definitely a fun race.  In fact, I really wouldn't even call it a race, but rather an event.  I participated in the event with Nate Younger, a neighbor as well as a member of our neighborhood running group.  We did not do this event for pace rather for pure enjoyment.  We took nearly 6 hours to run the 31 miles, where it would usually be done in about 4 and a half hours if done for time simply because we just tried to enjoy nature.  It was pretty sweet out there being in the wild where the buffalo run.  "All things denote there is a God; yea, even the earth, and all things that are upon the face of it, yea, and its motion, yea, and also all the planets which move in their regular form do witness that there is a Supreme Creator."


Just crossing the finish line