Saturday, October 5, 2024

 I need to remember the little things and how the little things mean the most. I had a beautiful moment tonight with Melissa and Eli and Ava. I asked Ava and Eli to come with me and Melissa to the movie to which they agreed. We decided to go have dinner and a movie tonight in which we were going to watch a scary movie. But before going to the scary movie, we had a little bit of time to kill. I asked any of them if they wanted to stop somewhere for dinner to which Melissa, Eli and Ava all said they were OK. Melissa said she was just going to have popcorn at the movie. Eli said he was full from eating panda express earlier in the day. And Ava said she was fine., But I still wanted to get something to eat  And so we got off the freeway from Melissa’s house and stopped in at Culver’s. We ordered a little bit of food. Ava got her Dr Pepper and Fries. Eli got a root beer float. I got a chicken sandwich and fries to which Melissa said she would eat the fries. I happily would share a meal with her. As we sat down at the table, we start eating. Melissa has beautiful hair tonight when I picked her up from the house, I noticed her wearing her hair in the side braid that she does. I love that look because it is so cute on her so, a little later as we’re sitting at the table, I look across the table at her again and complement her on her hair. I say to her, you are so pretty with that side braid. The memorable part of this interaction is that she starts looking back at me with the cutest smile and happiest grin and I ask her why she is smiling or laughing because the grin looks almost more like a laugh . She’s literally glowing back at me and she looks so beautiful. Then she tells me with the most innocent grin, I wore my hair like this for you! My heart melted. This is the pure love from her that I feel and fall in love with. Her affection for me is pure

 I had to sadly drive Melissa back home after the movie in lieu of bringing her home with me. That return drive home to drop her off is a dreaded moment. I get sad having to drop her off. I yearn to be with her. After dropping her off, I’m driving home with Eli and Ava. Well, typically they’re either usually quiet or squabbling like typical siblings do. But, tonight for almost the entire 25-minute drive to the townhome from Melissa’s home they had the windows down and just singing to music and keeping their heads out the windows and enjoying each other. It was bliss to my ears to hear them genuinely enjoy being with each other

Thursday, October 3, 2024

Life lately

 I have been dating the most special person, Melissa, now, for 4 months. A life lesson of mine is to look up and open up to experiences. Life is so much more about just buying things and objects. Have life experiences. Yes, sometimes you need money to have desired experiences. But, I know I am financially short on money right now, but I don’t want that to dictate or deter having experiences with people and especially with someone I care deeply about. We have been enjoying doing things together almost daily. For the most part, we just go to dinner almost each night and spend a couple hours together right now. I love being with her. I ache to be with her. She is constantly on my mind and I would spend 100% of my time with her if I could. So. We have been dating for 4 months now. One thing that has been tough on me is that she still hasn’t told me she loves me. I tell her frequently. I’d tell her everyday and every time with her if she’d say it to me. I know she has been hurt by her previous marriages to Kurt snd Roman. And, she has a hard time expressing herself verbally. It’s as if she wants to stay closed to not get hurt again. But, to express love to another, it doesn’t always need to be verbalized. In this case she expresses herself with her gestures and the way she spends time with me. I can feel she cares about me, and possibly does love me even though it’s not verbally expressed. This past Sunday she broke protocol and came to see me. Up until now, she had not been open to seeing me on a Sunday. But, I was in France for the previous 9 days. The day before returning home, she excitedly informed me that she was gonna come over. I was so excited. We had a wonderful dinner together where I made her chicken fettuccine Alfredo with a fruit salad and French bread. I love doing things for her as a way to show I care, appreciate and love her. After dinner, we made passionate love where we just laid together naked for a long time and she smiled at me and looked into my eyes so tenderly. I felt so connected with her and souls connecting. She has the most beautiful and radiating smile. Her hair is so shiny and beautiful. I love when she does her side bride cuz it looks so cute on her. I love her toned legs, her tight ass, her strong and sexy frame, her big perfectly shaped tits that love to be played with and caressed, her amazing smile, the way she smells is so refreshing, the way she is so feminine and radiating and beautiful. I can literally stare at her and gaze upon her being mesmerized by her pure goodness and beauty and warmth and preciousness that she is. My heart and soul yearns to be with her. Even the way her side braided hair and free flowing hair rests upon her shoulders, the way she wears her clothes is just so amazingly sexy. She checks all the boxes for me.  Yesterday, when we were driving over to Roxberry to get an açaí bowl, she made the comment that she’s a mess to me. She’s having a hard time because she hates her job and is such a conundrum right now because she needs the job but hates the company she’s with and not a good fit with the coworkers. Most others there are young and she says they’re all like teenagers. She mentioned how her boss was praising one her coworkers and telling her how awesome she was doing. Melissa has not had any positive encouragement from the boss at all. Melissa notes how just a little encouragement would go a long ways. Rather, it’s just always demanding more of her and critiquing. I like to reassure her of just how amazing and awesome she is. Melissa needs some positive experiences in her life and for things to go her way. Hopefully, I can help her see the positives in her life. I really want to be a strong support and positive influence for her to have amazing life experiences together. Cuz like I said at the beginning of this, life is so much more meaningful with wonderful experiences rather than just focusing on material possessions.